Did you know that most people fail at exercise? That isn't to say that we're doomed from the start, but that it's normal for many of us to abandon our fitness routines from time to time. Sometimes for days and weeks, other times for months or years.

The good news is that you're not alone and, even better, there's something you can do to make those fitness failures stepping stones to success. Your first step is figuring out what went wrong.

Planning your exercise schedule is great, isn't it? There's nothing like sitting down with your calendar and writing down all the workouts you'll do this week. Just thinking about it makes you feel good, doesn't it? But life has a way of getting in the way of those fitness goals. Maybe you have to work late or you catch a cold. Whatever 'it' is, it will happen and for many of us that 'it' sends our exercise plans right out the window.

You don't always have to be perfect

What's important to realise is this: you won't always be perfect at exercise and, even more important, you don't have to be. What you do want is to make your best effort and give yourself credit for what you achieve, even if it falls short of your original goal. To get yourself past those fitness failures, you have to stop the blame game and start taking some action.

Your first step in turning a failure around is to stop kicking yourself and realise you're not alone in this. We all skip workouts, eat more than we should and get off track from time to time.

In fact, many of my successful personal training clients come to me in the middle of their own fitness failures, feeling guilty and frustrated. Here's an example of two (note I have changed their names to protect their identity)

John was one of those clients, a 39-year-old man who'd been active with cardio and strength training for years. Then he got a new demanding job and realised he'd gained almost 12 kilograms and was suffering from back pain after abandoning his routine. He called me after a year of struggling with his weight, wondering how he'd gotten so far off track.

Nthabiseng was another client who came to me after having a baby. Despite her best efforts, she was having a hard time losing her baby weight and an even harder time trying to figure out how to take care of both herself and this new baby. By the time she came to me, it had been months since she'd exercised.

So, what happened? These clients had completely different situations, but ended up at the same place for the same reason: they didn't plan on how they'd continue exercising with these huge changes in their lives.

John didn't take into account the hours he'd be working and figured he'd just stick to his usual routine. When that routine didn't fit, he abandoned it rather than changing it. Nthabiseng also failed to plan on how she'd exercise with a new baby in the house. Once we figured out why their failures happened, we were able to use that failure to create better routines to fit their new circumstances.

You must risk failure

You can do the same thing for yourself and your first step? Risking failure.

The truth is, you don't know whether something will work for you until you try it and that means risking failure. The good news is that, even if you do fail, you have just given yourself an opportunity to learn something about yourself as you find out where you went wrong and how you need to change what you're doing the next time around.

These failures give you a chance to hone your technique, learn more about what you're trying to achieve and tweak your exercise routine until you get it right. You can't do that if you never try.

The problem is that we want to do everything right from the start, even if we've never done it before. But, you won't always get this exercise thing right the first time you try, so your only choice is to keep going despite your mistakes. If you find you've gotten out the habit of exercise, use these simple tips for getting back on track.

Get back to your routine

No matter how long you've been away, your first step is to get back to some kind of exercise. Even the smallest exercise goal is a step in the right direction and can remind you of your commitment to getting healthy, losing weight, or whatever your goal might be. Start small and ease your way back into a regular routine, setting goals you know you can reach. Even if it's a 10-minute walk after dinner or before work, it's a signal to yourself that you want to stay active.

Be flexible

Being prepared doesn't mean you'll never miss a workout. But, you can increase your chances of getting some exercise in each day by being flexible. That means a willingness to change your plans as needed so that you can meet your other obligations while still moving your body. If you find you can't go to the gym because your boss asked you to work late, what could you do instead? Don't abandon exercise just because you can't get your planned workout in.

Stop kicking yourself

We all feel guilty when we mess up — skipping workouts, eating too much, etc. Guilt can be a great motivator, but it can also be a hindrance if you use it as an excuse to abandon your healthy lifestyle altogether. That 'why bother' attitude can keep you stuck in a self-defeating cycle so, instead of feeding on that guilt, use it to propel you forward. Realise that slipping back into old habits doesn't mean you're loser — we all need to go back to old behaviours to test them out, remember how it felt to be that sedentary person as opposed to the new, more active person we want to become.

Let yourself evolve

Don't be afraid to try a whole new approach to exercise. If you find yourself going back to old workouts again and again, even though they don't work in your current lifestyle, it's time to admit that workout programme just doesn't work for you. Many of us approach exercise with ideas of what we should be doing rather than what we actually enjoy doing. Instead of forcing yourself into something you hate, why not allow yourself time to explore different options? Forget about what you should be doing, and find out what you want to be doing.

Forget being perfect

Making exercise a habit is a journey, not a destination. It's something you'll work on every day. Some days you'll do everything right, other days you won't. Focus on what you can do today to reach your goals and stop reaching for perfection. You're human and are allowed to make mistakes.

The only difference between a person who fails at exercise and a person who succeeds comes down to never giving up. A successful exerciser isn't perfect but, rather, keeps trying despite mistakes and failures. The next time you slip up, skip the guilt and allow yourself to use that slip as a learning experience. Your mistakes have something to teach you, something that could be the key to your success.