What is worse, my child is asking questions and I don't know what to tell him (he is six).

He is building towers and flying toy aeroplanes into them. Should I be worried?

Answer
This is quite normal. We are all traumatised; live news coverage brings a disaster like this into our homes (just think how much worse it must be for those who actually saw it happen or were there).

Children in particular may struggle to deal with a trauma or being a witness to violence, because they have fewer resources — but play is one thing they can do and it is helpful.

Let him play it out; you might take steps yourself to "invite" a different ending to his game, for example, police or fire engines coming and rescuing people.

We need to talk about this, to tell the story.

Official mourning is over in the USA, and war talk is the order of the day, but for those who lost relatives it is only just beginning, especially for the many who have nobody to bury and don't know what happened to their loved one.

Some are feeling very unheard, because they don't want revenge or war, which will only cause other families to lose as they have lost.

Others are still struggling to believe it.

Psych Online has a free "trauma pack" available which can help individuals, groups and counsellors who are still struggling to come to terms with this or are experiencing post-traumatic stress.

You can email me from the website and I'll send you the file (with no viruses!). Mark your email "Trauma Pack".